Thursday, December 25, 2008

Santa Claus Is Coming To Town (Rock Version)

This guy is doing an amazing job IMHO!!!

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Monday, November 3, 2008

Mosport International Raceway, Ontario 2008 Кольцевой заезд, Онтарио. Душевно покатались!



Photos available here / фотографии можно увидеть здесь:

http://picasaweb.google.ca/sudovenko/Mosport2008#


QuickTime movie (much nicer), видеоролик в номальном качестве:
http://www.box.net/shared/t6h3rpz7ej

Friday, September 12, 2008

Tough questions... from email I received recently..

Question 1:

If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who
were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had
syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion?

Read the next question before looking at the response for this one.

Question 2:

It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts.
Here are the facts about the three candidates. Who would you vote for?

Candidate A
Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologist. He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.


Candidate B
He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C
He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be our choice?

Decide first... no peeking for the response.

Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.

And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question: If you said YES, you just did away with Beethoven.


Pretty interesting isn't it? Makes a person think before judging someone.

Never be afraid to try something new.

Remember:
Amateurs...built the ark.
Professionals...built the Titanic

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Marriage jokes

You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable or get married and wish you were dead.

At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
’Aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?’
’Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.’

A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:
’Husband Wanted’.
Next day she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing:
’You can have mine.’


When a woman steals your husband,
there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.


A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished.


A little boy asked his father,
’Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?’
Father replied, ‘I don’t know son, I’m still paying.’


A young son asked,
’Is it true dad, that in some parts of Africa
a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her?’
Dad replied, ‘That happens in every country, son.’

Then there was a woman who said,
’I never knew what real happiness was until I got married,
and by then, it was too late.’

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.


If you want your spouse to listen and
pay strict attention to every word you say—talk in your sleep.

Just think if it weren’t for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

’A Woman’s Prayer:
Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, to understand a man, to Love and to forgive him, and for patience, for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I’ll just beat him to death ‘

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Bacon Sets Off Airport Bomb Detector





According to German news site Nachrichten, a passenger at the Linz airport set off alarms when his suitcase full of bacon was mistaken for a bomb. The story was translated with Google, so it's high on hilarity and low on verifiable detail.
http://gizmodo.com/5037081/bacon-sets-off-airport-bomb-detector

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Friday, June 6, 2008

Even naked man has a cell phone ! :)

Naked Man Rescued From Porta-Potty Hole
Rescue crews had to cut apart a portable toilet to rescue a drunk man who got stuck naked inside the potty's holding tank, where he called 911 from his cell phone.
-- CBS News, Friday, June 6, 2008

Friday, May 2, 2008

Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die...

Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is so priceless, and so easy to see happening, customer service being what it is today

A lady died this past January (2006), and Citibank billed her for February and March for their annual service charges on her credit card and added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0, now was somewhere around $60.

A family member placed a call to Citibank. Here is the exchange:
-----------
Family Member "I am calling to tell you she died in January."

Citibank: "The account was never closed and The late fees and charges still apply."

Family Member: "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections."

Citibank: "Since it is two months past due, it already has been."

Family Member: "So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"

Citibank: "Either report her account to frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!"

Family Member: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"

Citibank: "Excuse me?"

Family Member: "Did you just get what I was telling you? The part about her being dead?"

Citibank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor." (Supervisor gets on the phone)

Family Member: "I'm calling to tell you she died in January."

Citibank: "The account was never closed. And late fees and charges still apply." (This must be a phrase taught by the bank!)

Family Member: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"

Citibank : "Are you her lawyer?"

Family Member: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given)

Citibank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"

Family Member: "Sure." (Fax number is given)

After they get the fax:

Citibank: "Our system just isn't set up for death. I don't know what more I can do to help."

Family Member: "Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. I don't think she will care."

Citibank: "Well, the late fees and charges do still apply." (What is wrong with these people?!?)

Family Member: "Would you like her new billing address?"

Citibank: "That might help."

Family Member: "Odessa Memorial Cemetery, Highway 129, Plot Number 69."

Citibank: "Sir, that's a cemetery!"

Family Member: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?"
---------
Priceless ! ! !

Friday, April 25, 2008

How documentation you must write not...

"Already know you that which you need..."

"Many of the truths that we cling to depend on our point of view."

"Try not. Do or do not, there is no try...."

"Don't you call me a mindless philosopher you overweight glob of grease!"

"Size matters not! Judge me by my size, do you?"

"Ohhh! Great warrior! [laughs and shakes his head]
Wars not make one great!"

"You must unlearn what you have learned."

"Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will..."

"You will know (the good from the bad) when you are calm, at peace. Passive." A Developer uses the Java for knowledge and defense, never for attack. "

"A Developer's strength flows from the Java."

"Beware of the dark side. Anger...fear...aggression. The dark side of the Java are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight."

"A Developer must have the deepest commitment, the most serious mind."

"Adventure. Heh! Excitement. Heh! A Developer craves not these things."

"Always in motion is the future."

"And well you should not. For my ally in the Java. And a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. It's energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we...(Yoda pinches Luke's shoulder)...not this crude matter. (a sweeping gesture) You must feel the Java around you. (gesturing) Here, between you...me...the tree...the rock...everywhere! Yes, even between this land and that ship!"

"Concentrate...feel the Java flow. Yes. Good. Calm, yes. Through the Java, things you will see. Other places. The future...the past. Old friends long gone."

"Powerful you have become, the dark side I sense in you."

"Grave danger you are in. Impatient you are."

"Try not. Do or do not, there is no try."

"Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will."

"Always in motion is the future."

"Around the survivors a perimeter create."

"Size matters not."

"May the Java be with you."

"Blind we are, if creation of this clone army we could not see."

"A Developer's strength flows from the Java."

"Help you I can, yes."

"Strong am I with the Java."

"Agree with you the council does."

"Always two there are, no more, no less: a master and an apprentice."

"When 900 years you reach, look as good, you will not."

"Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. "

" Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Java, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Java around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship. "

" Ready are you? What know you of ready? For eight hundred years have I trained Developer. My own counsel will I keep on who is to be trained. A Developer must have the deepest commitment, the most serious mind. This one a long time have I watched. All his life has he looked away... to the future, to the horizon. Never his mind on where he was. Hmm? What he was doing. Hmph. Adventure. Heh. Excitement. Heh. A Developer craves not these things. You are reckless. "

Thursday, March 27, 2008

I FEAR NO BEER!

The list of favorites to remember:
80" (Scottish Ale)
Asahi (Japanese Dry beer)
Boddingtons Pub Ale (English Cream Ale)
Caffreys (Irish Ale)
Carling (Lager, Canada)
Fosters (Australian Lager Beer)
Gosser (Pils, Austria)
Guinness (Irish Beer)
Harp (Irish Lager)
Holsten (Beer, Hamburg, Germany)
John Smiths Pub Draught (UK's Ale)
Kaiser (Austrian Beer)
Kilkenny (Irish Ale)
Lvivske (Ukrainian Light & Premium Beer)
Leffe Brune (Belgium beer)
Old Speckled (English Ale)
Pilsner Urquel (Czech pils)
Sapporo (Japanese Premium beer)
Smithwicks (Irish Ale)
Tetleys (English Ale)
Velkopopovicky kozel (Czech beer)
Warsteiner (Premium Verum, Premium Dunkel)
Zlatorog (Slovenian Beer)

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Sounds promising...

http://www.newsdesk.umd.edu/uniini/print.cfm?articleID=1613

University of Maryland research that started with bacteria from the Chesapeake Bay has led to a process that may be able to convert large volumes of all kinds of plant products, from leftover brewer's mash to paper trash, into ethanol and other biofuel alternatives to gasoline.